Warning!!!!!!!
When reading this blog remember I am talking about how the show
portrays Max’s Asperger’s . My comments are not reflecting towards
anyone in life. For those that don’t know me I have three boys with
Autism, two with AS & one ASD. Theses comments are my opinions, I
ask that you put comments here on the blog page and not on FB and please
be respectful!!
Parenthood - I loved the first season, I
felt it was a little negative but they were just finding out Max’s dx so
I hoped the second season would be more positive. Well that hasn’t
happened, Kristina & Adam are STUCK on the dx. On the show they say
they got the dx a year ago but K&A act like they just found out.
This show has a great opportunity to show people about Autism & help
Society understand Autism. For this to work it would need to be
balanced, showing the good with the bad, so far the show is one sided -
NEGATIVE. They show a meltdown but don’t show K&A using methods to
help Max, on 2/22 episode Max has a meltdown about Gaby and K&A just
look at each other. The next day I saw a woman post the comment “my son
was just dx with AS, is that really what I have to look forward to?”
Scenes with the meltdown not showing that a child can regroup leaves a
bad impression on those who don’t understand Autism. Even if they didn’t
show how he regrouped, K&A could have talked about how a method
Gaby taught them worked. Oh wait, for that to happen, Gaby would
actually have to work with K&A implementing techniques. The rest of
my critiques will be by character name then the last episode.
Max -
For the most part the Max’s character is pretty good impression of AS.
I am glad to see that they are showing more meltdowns in more recent
episodes. Although some of the things he does is are not from AS, they
are normal kid things but he is not getting disciplined. The show is
just showing that a child with Autism is allowed to do what they want.
Most of society already thinks we use Autism as an excuse and the show
is supporting that thought. Most of you know I discipline the boys no
matter what the reason is for them acting up. We want the world to treat
ASD kids the same as others, then so must we as parents. I would never
let my nt daughter K talk to me with that attitude so you can be sure I
will not let my boys talk to me like that. No cues are given to Max and
they are not correcting his bad behavior enough to help him be
successful in life. Kristina worries about who will take care of Max,
well she should because she is not teaching him to take care of himself.
He should have chores & make his school lunch on his own, but he
does nothing for himself.
Gaby - Well great idea to have a
behavioral therapist around but in the real world most parents can not
afford to have a BT in the house most of the day. Why isn’t she
encouraging K&A to do the techniques with her so they won’t be lost
when she is not there. Max has a reward system that is mentioned but not
really shown, why hasn’t she set up discipline system for Max. He needs
to learn consequences for his actions. Gaby would have been the perfect
person to help K&A with the Birthday Party plans. Instead Kristina
was clueless to what she needed to do to prepare for a party with all
the children having Autism. Sorry but I think Crosby had it right - Gaby
is a babysitter for K&A. Gaby does not work with the family on
issues, she updates K&A just like a sitter would. Gaby, K&A
should be working together as a team, not have Gaby do all the work. Max
responds to Gaby better because he knows where he stands with her but
with K&A still not knowing what they are doing, Max is left not
feeling secure. Why hasn’t Gaby set up a sensory diet for Max yet.
K&A
Together - K- went to two support meeting & A - went to one
support meeting, they met with the Doc for dx, Halloween & telling
Max and they have done a little research online. In a years time they
should know a lot more about AS by now. They have one Autism family as
friends that act like they know all about Autism but by the way their
sons acts they are clueless. They don’t discipline their son & let
him eat everything in sight so how is this family suppose to help
K&A. K&A are never on the same page, K overreacts to EVERYTHING
& A is to laid back. By now the Doc should have told them to get
counseling themselves to learn to cope with Autism & how to work
together. There are times that Haddie seems like the adult in the house
instead of the parent. Why does K&A never include Haddie in on Max’s
AS therapy or talk to her about techniques for her and Max. After a
year of knowing about AS quirks, they did not pick up on the signs that
Andy the Bug Guy had AS. To call Andy weird was wrong!! Max and Andy
were acting exactly alike then K has the “deer in the headlights look”
when the teacher tells her Andy has AS. What really pissed me off was
even after they found out Andy had AS they still wanted to fire him.
They should have been really supportive of Andy and NOT nitpick Andy’s
quirks.
Adam - He screams at Crosby that Max has Asperger’s but
Adam is in denial. On one hand is denial has him pushing Max to do
things but he is pushing for the wrong reasons. He is pushing Max
because he wants Max to be NT, when he should be pushing Max so Max will
be able to take care of himself someday. Has anyone noticed that Adam
himself needs a schedule??? And can be quite anal about certain issues??
Adam needs a Autism Father Mentor to help him work thru his issues. Why
is it Adam wants Max to have his interests but then he puts down Max’s
interest in bug. Even with NT children there is no guarantee that a
child with have the same interests as his/her parents so why is this
such an issues.
Kristina - Sorry but she needs to be bitch slapped
every episode!!!!! K has more meltdowns than Max does and her paranoia
is unreal and annoying. She is overly controlling to EVERYTHING and not
in a good way. Max’s dx is high functioning AS and K cries like he is
dying. ALL her crying would be understandable if Max had appointments a
month, working every waking hour to help Max talk, hug and watching him
every second to make sure he doesn’t get hurt because he doesn’t feel
pain. The show has not portrayed Max to be out of control all the time
like many ASD children are. Again Gaby is the one handling Max most of
the time so I do not understand why k cries so much. She needs to STOP
stereotyping AS and enjoy Max with HIS interests.
Telling Max -
First he is smart and old enough, he should have been told during the dx
process. The faster a child understands why they have quirks the better
they are about learning to cope with them. It is not realistic that in a
years time K&A never thought about telling Max about his AS. Even
if they hadn’t thought about it they could have asked Max to give them a
few minutes to gather their thoughts before talking to him. They made
having AS sound so bad you would have thought they were giving him a
death sentence. All the crying & “deer in the headlights look” from
Kristina was insane. When Max asked if they had AS that was a perfect
opportunity to explain they everyone has quirks, some more than others.
Then they could have told Max about K controlling OCD behavior & A
about him needing routines. I love how the Doctor treated them about how
they handle telling Max. I loved how he kept telling them to point out
the positive side and not focus on the negative. What I don’t understand
is why the show has the Doctor say to be positive about AS but the show
does not follow that advice. I would love for the show to have the
Bravermans meet a family that has been dealing with Autism longer and
that they can show K&A that AS does not have to be so sad or hard
ALL the time. Yes there are hard times, sad times but there are also
good times, great times and then there are times when your child gives
you a hug after months of working with him. Or the times when your son
gets a basket during a game for the first time and his teammates,
coaches and parents stand up, scream and cheer like your son just won
the world championship.
My idea - Have them get a new BT that will
set Max up with a sensory diet( I will even make & donate a
weighted blanket from Karleen‘s Ideas), work with K&A on techniques
& set Max up with group therapies to help with social skills. Set up
rules, rewards & discipline board for Max to follow. Throw out his
video games and have him interact more with others. Get more families
with Autism on the show to show both families struggling and families
who are not struggling. Also have someone teach Max to embrace his AS
and to be proud of his AS the way my Donald is about his AS.
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